Hamba ALLAH swt yang Luarbiasa !

hi hi bye bye

#biar saja

Lama kan blog ni sunyi. March to October. How times flies very fast.

Assalamu’alaikum wbt..

                                    Biar saja tanpa cinta sekali ini…
                                    Biar saja nanti pun datang lagi..
                                    Biar saja tanpa rindu sekali ini…
                                    Biar saja sementara sendiri…

I’m listening to this song while writing this post and crying alone when i missed them a lot. Al-fatihah. Semoga Allah swt tabahkan hati ini dari hari ke hari.
Izinkan diriku lenyapkan segala namun ku xterdaya melupakan segalanya..
Kini ku sendiri hilang segala cinta..sebuah reality bernoktah di sini..

It’s hard to accept that they are all gone. What makes my heart broke is i am dreaming of them. I keep dreaming that i am hugging, kissing and touch them as they are still alive.

Everyone thought that I am okay after few months. Seeing my laugh my smile and my happiness but they didn’t even know about my litre of tears before i closed these eyes every night. How hard to accept that you lost a lot of your beloved person.

“Aku sendiri xtahu bagimana rasanya redho.”

When i opened my eyes, i just want to see them. I want to meet them as usual.  But now we are separated by death.  The space inside this heart can’t be filled with anything. That’s why i learnt to appreciate every person in my life. I can’t bear for another lost. I try not to hurt them, and keep them inside this heart.

Ujian Allah swt, tiada siapa pun dapat menjangka. What I am hoping for, I’m not being tested with losing of another person that I love.  Aamiin.

Its 02.14 am now (10102015) and i think this is the best time to blog since my mind cleared and my soul calmed. Okay let me tell you what ive been through for this few months of 2015. Since the 2015 will be at the end and our Maal Hijrah will coming.

#after nek tih gone
-          My sister married at my 24th birthday, 25 April 2015 (smirking)
-          I resigned as the teacher and start to work as admin assistant for 3 months
-          I am doing part time job for rm8/hour as the private tutor
-          I’ve attended the interview for Pegawai Psikologi S41 but I am failed.
-          Now its October and i am self-employed for two months by selling my own cheescuits products by COD and supplied it to UiTMians. Kah3
-          I’m still fear of losing someone i love.  (known as thantophobia)
-          I am divorce with rice and start my Atkins Diet, my coach is my PLKN’s friend, Iza.
-          I can ignore the rice but not the cheese cakes! I should trying more harder
-          I am practicing skipping for 100 at the evening every day.
-          And now, its 2:21am, i am sitting in front of my laptop to apply the Pembantu Setiausaha Pejabat Gred N17 (SPM Qualification) to fulfill my mama’s wish and be the job hunter.
-          I am seeking for a husband to be. WHATTTT? HAHAHA  (i can really imagine all of my friend’s face who reading this)sorry gals, :P

Okay, that’s all. I think that is enough to update my progress. (konon2 ada pembaca setia)
See you soon! :)